Should you get a videographer for your wedding? Ask these questions to get the answer that’s right for you without needing more opinions.
And that’s a good start, but it’s going to lead you to a lot of dead ends that are going to drive you a little mad.
And then things get a little muddy.
Your friends tell you not getting a wedding video was immediately their biggest regret. Others tell you that they were thrilled splurging on a photographer and skipping the whole video thing.
Some friends tell you the opposite: they splurged on an expensive photographer and hired a videographer at the last minute. And even though it’s not the best quality, they like the video FAR more and found the photographer to be overrated.
Others tell you they hired a college kid to film the ceremony, took that money, and spent it on something else.
Gah! You end up being more confused than ever. How are you ever going to make this decision?
All of these questions have to do with knowing yourself and what’s important to you. (None of them have anything to do with what other people think you should do.)
Not surprisingly, none of those questions have anything to do with whether or not you feel like you’re pretty enough on camera or if you should upgrade your honeymoon suite.
Because that’s not where regret comes from, my friend. Wedding video regret comes from putting other people’s priorities before your own.
Your core values are your Northstar, the concepts in life that make you happy. These are the things in life that make you feel complete, regardless of all else. Big stuff, right?
If your friends and family mean everything to you and you love to look back at all the fun times you had—(family, friends, memories) those are all core values. If you choose not to have a wedding video you’re choosing not to invest in your core values. That WILL impact your life. There’s no question about it.
Sometimes your head is just too much, and it gets in the way of what you REALLY want. I know mine does.
Ever get a gut feeling about something? That’s your intuition; it lives in the pit of your stomach. You need to pay attention to that gut feeling when it comes around because that feeling is your intuition’s way of trying to get your attention. (Ignore it enough times, and it becomes an ulcer.)
So how do you know when it’s time to listen to your intuition? Your intuition refuses to be ignored, and so, very helpfully, it gives you plenty of reminders. It’s unrelenting, bordering on nagging. If you keep ignoring it, it sends bigger and bigger signals.
When it comes to considering a wedding videographer, your intuition can be recognized by the sinking feeling that you’re going to miss a log of things you really want to have seen. It’s not a question; it’s a genuine feeling. Almost like you know it’s going to happen despite what anyone else is telling you. That’s your body telling you, “Hey, friend, I have an answer for you!”
I totally get that question. Wedding videography is NOT inexpensive. The single resource in our lives that we can never EVER replenish is time.
You can never get time back. Of course, you have a fear of missing out. You’d be missing out on the time you had. It’s not FOMO as in “do I want it just because everyone else has it and I’m unsure.”
When you’re 70, do you really think you’ll have regretted spending $5000 on videographer 45 years ago?
Some people will calculate their value of getting a wedding videographer on whether or not they’ll watch their wedding film enough to make the investment worth it.
But this isn’t really what it’s about (not for you or for anyone else).
You’re probably not wondering if your cake is worth it because you can only eat it once (and you don’t even get to eat all of it). Or if the band is worth getting because they only play at your wedding once (they don’t even play for the ENTIRE wedding, just a couple hours). Or the open bar, the food, the upgraded bonfire with S’mores bar… you see where I’m going with this.
So what’s it really about, then? It’s about your biggest priorities.
And when you make a decision for yourself based on your core values, you’re making the authentic choice for you.
What was my #1 priority in our wedding budget? Cake (naturally). There was no way I was getting anything other than a wedding cake from Wojtczak’s Bakery. Which was our family’s wedding cake baker for 4 generations. (Technically we eloped but we also had a separate wedding reception for my family back in Rochester, NY.)
To me, it wasn’t a wedding, couldn’t BE a wedding without a cake from Wojtczak’s. I would have moved heaven and earth to have that cake.
Think about what this videographer might do for you besides just a stroll down memory lane (which is wonderful on its own but it does have other uses).
It can help you and your beloved remember how deep your love is for one another (especially after big fights). The shiny newness of marriage wears off over time and it’s important to remember how intensely it started so you can keep that alive.
Your wedding highlight trailer can be an instant pick-me-up on craptacular days. Short, sweet, and it lives online so your phone can access it in an instant.
Years will march on. Five, ten, twenty years from now you’ll be different people.
You’ll look different, sound different, and chances are you’ll hurt your back just by waking up. Wedding videos are a wonderful reminder (and proof) of how young you once were (and also how limber you were).
It’s an amazing bonding experience for kids to see their parents as regular human beings instead of their parental overlords.
A wedding film brings them back into your life for a tiny bit, their laughter, joy, and hearing them tell you they love you—as someone who has recently lost her mother, that’s damn priceless. You don’t think about that when everyone is in their prime.
Fifteen years or so after getting married, I’d give anything to hear my mom tell me she loved me again. And believe me when I tell you that, when I got married at 25, I KNEW EVERYTHING I could possibly ever want from then until forever. End of story.
So what might seem like an insane investment to you now—trust me… it’s an investment and its value continues to make gains as it ages.
It can be so many things besides just a wedding video. Who knew?
We’ve decided to please our parents, concede to our beloved, say ‘yes’ to events we don’t want to go to so we don’t disappoint friends—all because we think it will make life easier when we don’t fight for what we really want.
And what does this look like for a wedding video? It could be that you desperately want to make good budget choices because you want to show your parents how responsible you are. It might also show up as curbing your enthusiasm because your fiancé feels like you’ve got some raging FOMO going on and you want to show them that you don’t need a wedding video because your friends got one.
But constantly appeasing others ends up as a burden and you being unkind to yourself.
Making decisions to make other people happy or because you’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings is a fast road to resentment. That will build up inside of you so fast. Hello, Toxic City. Not to mention, counterproductive. It’s inauthentic to you and your people, making a healthy relationship almost impossible to pull off.
Imagine what you would do if no one ever found out what decision you made. If your decision would hurt no feelings—would you get a wedding videographer—and which one would you get?
I know it can overwhelming to thinking about getting a wedding film. And it’s also tempting to put it off until the very last minute because of wedding planning stress.
Putting of your decision can really backfire on you, making your stress so much worse, just closer to your wedding date.
I know it’s tempting to ask everyone you’ve ever known if getting a wedding videographer is worth the investment. But the only person with the right answer is you.
After asking yourself these questions, you should know if you should hire a wedding videographer. Then you just have to go out and get it done!
Hello, I'm CINDY CAUGHEY.
Drawing from our experience as a graphic designer (Cindy) and journalist (Sean), we see stories differently. Our films reflect honesty, strength of character, and real moments, all in a way that's natural and comfortable.
Whether our films help you to find the light within or provide a story of your day, we feel this is our opportunity to help your legacy live on throughout time.